egad!

I'm about tired. Friday is Momma's latest night of the week, as it is now Saturday and I'm still waiting for her. This is the last one for about two months though. Somehow, I have to start going to bed at a reasonable time. I can't be up all night Friday and coach those kids on Saturday.

I'm sure it could be sappy that I wait up for my wife, but honestly, it's probably an excuse to just sit here and waste a few more hours running in circles on the computer. Either way, I'm into my cups and jumping at every possible car noise from the street.

I don't know why I keep jumping. As often as I've heard that car pull up out front and into the driveway, it's not something I'll miss. But I still notice a car at the intersection half a block away. I can also hear trucks on the interstate when I'm outside smoking. I only notice them really late at night, but it's still trucks.

I'd guess the train is about a mile away too, and we hear that pretty often. I never think at the time, but I could figure out when to expect it. I could probably even find train info and schedules online. I wonder sometimes though about the times we miss the train. They run fairly often, so we kind of get used to it. But if you've ever had a wooden train track in your floor, you know you may not be the only one hearing that train.

I love the look I saw just a few days ago in The Boy's eyes. He was playing, oddly enough, when we both heard that far off sound of the train. It was so low and quiet but distinct. After a moment I heard another long low train sound, only this one was much closer. The Boy smiled and explained about the train sound and ran off to play.

One of my little regrets is that I never got a chance to hop a train and end up down the line somewhere. I suppose in a sense I did that, but there wasn't really a train. It was actually a Volkswagen, but that's really not tonight's story.

I love animals

But my favorite is probably pork.

hang up and drive

Once again, from our local alternative paper, a delightful story. This one is from News of the Weird.

A woman, driving her SUV, lost control, ran several cars off the road, and ended by flipping her SUV. The jaws of life were used to extricate most of her which was still in the car. In what I see as poetic justice, her arm was still on the road having been ripped off. In her hand was her cell phone.

I'm tired of near misses due to cell phone use. I'm tired of watching idiots whose cell phone use inhibits their ability to drive sanely and safely.

So please, idiots of the world, hang up your phone. Driving a car carries with it a number of responsibilities. When you are engaged on your phone, you can not give driving the attention it deserves. No one else deserves the aggravation, not to mention the possibility of actually hurting other people. You phone call is not more important that the safety of me and my family. So hang up and drive!

little bit worried

Statcounters can be fun. They certainly provide a wealth of information, if by "wealth" it can be assumed that I mean "a lot of useless." It is interesting to know all those fun things you learn with the stat counter. One of my favorites is learning what people searched that caused your site or blog to come up.

If you've read my page, I'm sure you've learned that I'm not especially enamored with wiping butts that aren't mine. It's a fact of parenthood, and I certainly won't begrudge my boys clean butts if I have the power to fix the problem. But I do see a time, growing ever closer, when I will retire from being a wiper of butts other than mine.

Here's my concern. While checking my stats, I noticed that this blog has once more shown up as a hit in a search. The search terms were "little boys wiping their butts." There are plenty of benign reasons a person may search this. Perhaps someone would like help getting their little boy to learn to wipe. I have a self wiper that once needed help. And even after the diaper years, when he was fully qualified to self wipe, he would often ask for help.

Regardless of those benign reasons, I do have a healthy wariness in regards to the internet. Their are some true assholes in this world. So "little boys wiping their butts" could just as easily be some malignant fuck. Just in case that's the issue, I'm inventing a god to pray to so that this person, if they do mean harm, will wake up dead the next time they lay down.

If however the search is just a concerned parent, please remember front to back, and eventually we do all figure it out.

not joining google groups for this

There has to be a way to check my comments here without having to actually visit the blog. Does anyone out there know of a way? I don't want to moderate the comments, nor do I want them as emails. I've looked around at Blogger, and the answer seems to lie in joining google groups and asking for help there. I don't need to join any other groups, and I'll tell you why. Within days I'd be at the homeschooling group, wasting valuable hive mind time. I know how I am.

So seriously, someone knows the answer to my question. Fess up ya bunch of clodhoppers!

frickin' awesome

Not to brag, but our weather has been outrageous for a few days now. Monday was a little cool for the amount of sun we had. Yesterday, we ran errands and had to lose our jackets pretty quickly. After a short run home for food between errands we were off to soccer practice.

It was so nice to get out and play yesterday, and today, though it's cooled down a bit over the past hour is still beautiful. The boys have both been outside most of the day. They even ate lunch outside. I have windows open all over the house, partly to keep track of the boys playing outside, partly because I can't not invite some of this beauty inside. The breezes will blow through the house and blast out those winter doldrums.

I should be outside, but I keep telling myself that I'm almost done on the computer. The lie continues that I will then do the housework I've let slide for days. I have a case worth of empty beer bottles plus a least two other six packs. I have the other random recyclables sitting in the kitchen waiting to go out. The trash from the bathroom is sitting there as well, waiting to go out. I've actually been out plenty today, blowing my nicotine breath toward the heavens, but I have so far succeeded in doing little actual housework. I've actually done no housework if you don't count feeding people. And I think the feeding kids part is a whole other level of thing we do, above and beyond mere housework.

I did have a minor meltdown, feeling put upon and not respected, so I piled all of the toys littering the living room into one big pile. I haven't really done anything to get the mess cleaned up even before my temper tantrum from earlier. And now the pile sits behind me, and it almost seems to smirk as I walk past and see how big an ass I was earlier when I created the huge pile.

Off again to the outside. I need to check my BNL (blood nicotine level) before I ignore the dishes and recycling in favor of running around the blogs to see if I've missed anything.

not the good kind of geek

I can be a geek sometimes and about certain things. I'm kind of a beer geek which is probably my biggest claim to geekhood. I'm not a computer geek in the sense that I can really do anything with them that isn't already ready already. Blogger and Myspace are perfect examples. I love playing with them, but I'm almost afraid to mess with any of the parts where you can actually see the code. I'm afraid I'll fuck it all up if I'm not careful.

No, in computer geek terms I'm not the good kind to have around. I'm the kind that randomly discovers something neat and is amazed, regardless of the size of the discovery.

Here I am, full of glee at my newest discovery. Maybe I am the last person to discover this, and it really is not that big a deal. I'm tempted now to just highlight and backspace this whole damn thing and write something less inane. Yeah, not really my style.

Are you in suspense, anxiously awaiting this amazing discovery? Don't say I didn't warn you when you find yourself feeling somewhat underwhelmed or even deflated.

This is where I say that I am not the last person to discover Firefox. I'm on this one already, and I mention it because the discovery pertains to Firefox. When you have multiple tabs open, you can click and drag a tab and change the order of your tabs.

Pretty fucking righteous right? I thought so to. I'm going to right click on all kinds of things in the next blog I visit, and then I'm going to move the tabs around. I wish someone else was here right now because I would totally show them! That's cooler than you can fit in a 40 oz. Diva Cup.

my lent story

I'm giving up lent for lent.

Who am I kidding, I don't even know what the hell lent is. I think it's one of those crazy catholic holidays, but from what I've come to understand, when listing holidays, we should list lent under the "sucks" category.

I once had a friend give up liquor for lent. This didn't help her maintain any sobriety as wine and beer are not liquor. The year before she mentioned giving up caffeine. I'd just as soon beat up grandma with a baby than give up caffeine.

My religion, if I were to actually follow the Discordian teachings, would allow me, if I wanted, to take on an extra habit for lent. It's not in the Principia, but I'm sure it would be allowed.

To any good catholics out there, first, what the hell are you doing reading my craptastic blog? It's almost lent for christ's sake. Second, I don't intend to offend. I do accept that it is a natural tendency of mine to offend, and I don't actually care, but I don't intend to offend.

Okay, the sun is out, the day is lovely and my ass needs to be out going to stores and making purchases. The economy ain't gonna drive itself.

Rant for the day: I'm out of half and half. I have only had one cup of coffee today and am already out of half and half. I hate using milk in my coffee. I make good coffee, not some burnt water flavored shit that comes hermetically sealed in a foil vacuum pack, and I deserve real half and half! Dangit!

nswtm

I am operating with most of a deck of cards. One of the aces is missing from my brain, so we had to use a Sharpie and write on one of the Jokers to replace the missing card. I'm working with a nswtm, or a not so well trained mind.

I don't own any cookbooks, so please, someone help me find the easiets and most basic of recipes. My ds12 has been thinking about girls lately. Can anyone tell me how to redirect his focus so that I will remain, not just his mother, but also his sole female companion? I don't want Satan to steal my babies pure heart.

I have pain in a part of me. Or I have some illness. It is very common and something we are all familiar with. Please line up to console/comfort me and tell me you will pray for slight cough.

Oh Gosh-a-mighty! Who left the doors open? Open minds might slip in and question things, the answers to which make us uncomfortable. Oh, please start praying that they will go away soon. I can't stand the glare from the open mind as the light of reason forces its way into my closed mind shell.

sore as I said

Yes, as I mentioned when discussing my need for a drink, my hips are sore, my back is sore, my thighs are sore . . .

My elbow is feeling better today. I did't think of it till today, but the elbow ache may have been from sleeping on it. I do tend to sleep on one arm or the other, usually the left, and some days I seem to sleep on it worse than others.

I didn't mentione my calves, but they are also sore. I did stretch well before playing. I really did, and that may have helped no pull anything. I really need to just exercise.

So here we have it. A short blog, not quite worth reading, but if you are unsatisfied for any reason, any reason at all, I will gladly refund the original purchase price, though you, dear reader, will have to pay shipping.

master of the test

I am 76% Asshole/Bitch.

I am one of those people that love to hear the sound of their voice. That and my lousy attitude make for a mixture as toxic next-day-mexican-dinner-ass-drip.

Take the
Asshole/Bitch Test
@ FualiDotCom

I've taken way too many of these tests. I'm apparently not very punk or ska, regardless of what I may have thought. I'm just not as cool as I wanted to be. I'm fairly white trash/redneck, but I'm also from Georgia originally, and I still live in the South. Of all the tests I've taken, this is the one on which I scored the highest. On no other test did I score even close to this high. So, I'm more asshole than I am punk? How does that work?

ready for a drink

I'm about to have to fix myself a drink. There's beer, but I believe this calls for some Capatain Morgan and Black Cherry Vanilla Coke. It's also good with Sprite or even iced tea, the rum that is, especially iced tea, but we don't have any made, and the Coke company is nice enough to not only make their drink but also place it in a convenient bottle.

Most days I feel like a drink much earlier than this, but I pretend toward responsible parenting and put it off till laterish. I'm a bit of a curmudgeon (putting it wildly mildly) and find that the kids stress me out a little. I'm also blaming it on the winter hibernation, cabin fever and all.

Which brings up another point about today's need for a drink. I need to run, to go outside and jog, to make it a habit.

Today I need the drink because I played soccer. We had a "practice" that was not too far removed from a regular game. The teams weren't really what they will be I don't think, and we didn't have a referee.

I don't always need a drink just because I played, but I've done something to my elbow that a Goody's powder might not remedy. I don't know what I did though. I may have fallen on it, or perhaps it's achey from falling on my hand with my arm straight out. I may or may not have done that.

I did fall, and I did tackle a couple of times. The knees of Momma's sweat pants are muddy from some of that (I don't have my own so Momma cringe-ingly donates.) My knees are goofy from running, and the hips are going to be achey tomorrow. But the elbow thing has me stumped. It's a really dull and weak sort of hurt, but it's a new hurt. I'm used to the knees and hips hurting. I'm used to hitting the ground on my hands a couple of times per game and having them feel unpleasant.

Whiney poo!

I did have a blast though for the half hour I had the stamina for. I didn't run that entire time, and my lungs maintained a steady stream of complaints. But I got to play! I ran into some grown ups running pretty hard (good for destressing.) I executed some really great tackles, stopping a couple of runs toward my goal. I certainly feel some of the winter's build up of stress has been left on the field.

The first adult games are next Sunday. We are playing on some fields I've never seen before at the park named for one of our town's most craptastic of mayors. I don't believe the fields will suck as much as he did, but that's so off topic that I'm giving it the old, "Don't go there!"

poem for spring

This is my favorite spring time poem. I'm putting it here in honor of the very first daffodil bud just about to pop open in my front yard. I'm afraid they'll get frozen, but considering my anti-winter feelings, it's always a good sign to me.

Daffodowndilly
by A.A. Milne

She wore her yellow sun-bonnet,
She wore her greenest gown;
She turned to the south wind
And curtsied up and down.
She turned to the sunlight
And shook her yellow head,
And whispered to her neighbour:
"Winter is dead."

MESS!!!

Yeah, the house is the same mess it always is. I get so tired of having to dodge all the piles of toys, but I'm way too lazy to bother picking it up. Also, getting the boys to help clean is its own special hell, so I just end up ignoring it all.

The mess doesn't bother me so much in and of itself, but it grows like a child till it's just a horrid dangerous bunch of crap waiting to trip us all and take us down, kind of like my the kids again. And right now, The Boy is really loving the puzzles. So any cleaning currently involves sorting through all the scattered puzzles and pieces, putting them back together and putting them up. Within a half an hour though, he wants them back out. If I just leave them out, they get dumped out together and ignored.

Here's the honest moment of the day. Homeschooling isn't the easiest thing in the world if you want to do it well. You have to pay attention to your kids. You have to keep the messes picked up. You have to think about stuff. Sometimes, when you really want the messes picked up, you have to ignore them and be okay with messes.

My weakness is being somewhat okay with the messes. Okay, my real weakness is the lit up teat that is the computer. I know better, but I just sit here all day every day constantly opening up the bookmarks menu to check the same blogs, just in case there's something new somewhere.

So I'll publish this dumb thing and surf on over to someone elses site. I'll clean up the mess after I accidentally trip over something and finally freak out about it. Or maybe, and even better, I'll suddenly not be a lazy procrastinating slob.

freaky bedtime

I'll admit right now that this story isn't really that great, but it made my night a little nicer. If that title doesn't bring some soon to be disappointed readers, then fuck it, I'm a failure at something.

Anyway, The Boy watched his movie, ate some blueberries, didn't fall asleep, ate some Pez and thankfully didn't fall asleep. I was hoping I'd get his teeth brushed after all that before he went to sleep, but it was late, so I grew worried.

We did get his teeth brushed. We read some books first, then he wanted his last book in bed. After the book, he wanted me to lay with him. I don't actually bother, but I do kind of crouch on the floor with my head on his pillow. Momma actually gets in the bed and has fallen asleep before.

I made up and sang some songs as usual. One was about him and Big Brother stealing some melons and running from Old Mr. Goofball. The other was a really poorly cobbled together bunch about Thomas getting James' freight cars. Percy also shunted the express coaches to the station for Gordon. I always, always have a brain fart at "sing to me" time, and I never can think of the lyrics to an actual song. So I don't quite lay in his bed and don't quite sing songs to him, but he seems to not not like it.

I finally gave him his last smooch and achingly stretched myself back upright. I pulled his door closed and turned off the hall light. I remembered leaving my beer in the kitchen, so I grabbed that and headed back to the other end of the house.

I was curious what would come next. With Big Brother, it can be anything. He lost screen time today for standing on the arm of the sofa. He was actually running across the love seat, but as I entered the room he was mid-something on the arm, and he saw me and slowly sunk to the ground. So whatever he did pre-bedtime, it wouldn't involve video games or cartoons.

In the end it didn't matter. I saw him laying on the sofa and thought he was joking at first. I let him lay there and snore thinking I would outwait him. I knew he couldn't lay there and snore, looking so asleep for long. But he didn't move. I thought of tickling him, making him admit that he wasn't really asleep. But then I thought, if the sleep were real, I could easily ruin it if he wasn't very much asleep.

In the end, I ignored him for a minute. Then I got his covers neat on his bed and carried his big long ass back to bed. It's so early for him, and I have the whole night to myself. That isn't saying much considering the time and that tonight is Momma's really late night at work. I might not be up when she gets here. This is my special time. I'll use it to do write silliness! And probably check Myspace.

idiot has me stumped for a title

The following quote is from a letter to the Metro Pulse, our local alternative news weekly. It's a great little paper, if you live around here and need to know what bands are playing where. This letter though just really gave me a laugh, and not the good kind. This sample is the real clincher for me.

So here’s this little girl awash in this huge back seat. I say to her, “How old do you have to be before you can sit in the front seat?” She replies: “13.” “And how old are you?” “7.” So I say: “You’re relegated to the back seat for the next eight years?”

Never mind that his math is that far off. Never mind that he is ridiculing a law that is intended to protect children, those among us with often the least faculty to make the wisest of decisions. Also, never mind that he is taking the word of a child concerning the law and is misinformed.

• Children age four (4) through age eight (8), and measuring less than five feet (5') in height, must be secured in a belt-positioning booster seat system, meeting federal motor vehicle safety standards in the rear seat, if available, or according to the child safety restraint system or vehicle manufacturer's instructions. (Note: If the child is not between age four (4) and age eight (8), but is less than five feet (5') in height, he/she must still use a seat belt system meeting federal motor vehicle safety standards.)
• Children age nine (9) through age twelve (12), or any child through twelve (12) years of age, measuring five feet (5') or more in height, must be secured in a seat belt system. It is recommended that any such child be placed in the rear seat, if available. (Note: If the child is not between age nine (9) and age twelve (12), but is five feet (5') or more in height, he/she must still use a seat belt system meeting federal motor vehicle safety standards.)

His problem with all of this is that liberals are ruining life by making laws that force safety measures on people. He apparently bonded with family while riding in the front seat as a child, and he's uses that sad old arguement that what didn't kill him is certainly okay for the next generation.

He chides us for using studies about safety and airbags in order to push these laws on us. I wonder if he's ever lost a loved one, a very young one who couldn't decide how safe they wanted to be.

I too grew up riding in the front seat. I grew up thinking of seatbelts as those things you had to pull out whenever you lost something down the back seat. Honestly, I only saw the seatbelts in the back when I pulled them out, creased from being jammed down into the seat where they would be out of the way. When I found my quarter or my pencil, I stuffed them right back down. I certainly want my children in the safest place that I can find for them, and I don't really need the force of the law. The facts and the studies are really quite enough for me.

I do disagree to some extent with some laws that I see as overzealously enforcing safety, helmet laws for instance. If you have a motorcycle and choose not to wear a helmet, you should certainly be old enough to take that chance. That is in no way similar to riding in someone's lap, in the front seat of a car. In addition to the child's safety, the entire car is safer knowing that the child is fixed and immovable. For all the control we feel when driving, few other venues offer such small margins of error with such great opportunities to do great damage.

All that to say this. To the jackass that wrote that letter, put the girl where she is safe, in the back seat. Next, to make especially sure she is safe, ask someone else to drive, jackass! Not that this guy will see this, but here are some facts.

the library, finally

We have been missing the library lately. With letting the boys stay up later at night came the obvious sleeping later in the day. Our best day to have the car are those days when Momma works in the morning and get's off early enough in the evening.

So we haven't been getting up at 8:00 a.m. and haven't been taking Momma to work. We have been stuck at home day after interminable day. It's been too nasty and cold to go out most days, mostly because I really, really hate winter.

We finally made it to the library today. Momma had to be at work at noon and is working to volume, basically meaning that she leaves when the place is dead enough to not need her. Since she will be off before anyone's bedtime, we hope, we took her, dropped her off and went straight to the library.

I had forgotten the stroller, actually having assumed it was in the trunk, so that The Boy walked. He's a great walker, but he is an even better meanderer. Not having the stroller meant no books for me unless I wanted a juvenile or YA book, which I sometimes do. I actually have enjoyed many jfiction books lately thinking that I was "screening" them for Big Brother. I refuse to take both boys through the non-children's books if The Boy isn't in his stroller both to save my own sanity as well as to keep the noisey running to a minimum for the other library patrons. My boys can be noisey!

We did visit the second floor for the A/V department, though I couldn't really convince either of them to actually look at the cd's. For what it's worth, we checked out the following music:
-Beethoven-String Quartets-Alban Berg Quartet
-Gene Krupa-In Concert
-Steve Earle-Essential Steve Earl
-Bob Dylan-Biograph
I was sure that we'd gotten more music, but I was wrong.

Our local NPR station's night time jazz show was all big band recently, and they played Sing Sing Sing with that amazing Gene Krupa opening that just puts that fire in your ass. I don't remember which blogger that I read recently pontificated on Beethoven's string quartets. I'm not much into classical music generally, but I also don't dislike it. Steve Earle, well, he's Steve Earle, and if you don't know, take yourself to the store and get some. Bob Dylan, well, he's . . .can't use that one again . . .hmmm. Big Brother knows of Dylan through some Johnny Cash stuff we have with Dylan singing in the back somewhere. He noticed the recent documentary about Dylan, No Direction Home, and got more and more excited about it as he saw more commercials. Then the show finally came on, and it wasn't quite what he expected. I enjoyed it, while he, growing quickly bored, did not watch much. So I've been checking the library when we used to go weekly oh those months ago, but for some reason, Bob Dylan seems to be fairly popular so that his work is always checked out.

We also picked up our usual couple of Thomas the Tank Engine videos and I found some books to read to The Boy. Big Brother is rereading the Harry Potter books, finishing the first two in record time. For the coolest Harry Potter link that I've seen lately, try these spells.

We also owe the library a bit more money than I thought. We got into a bit of a time period, as I've mentioned, where we weren't visiting the library as regularly as we usually do. I messed up, got confused then found the stuff I thought we'd returned. Thankfully, we don't owe them a lot of money, though owing the library any money is too much to me. I'm in love with the library and am not happy with myself when I disrespect her or her books.

Time to step outside for my post lunch smoke, then back here to the headphones and some Gene Krupa.

cheers!

soccer and snow

It's snowing again. Our forecast for the next week is a crappy mix of rain and snow. I need to get busy calling my team. Our first practice will be scheduled for next week, and our first game is much too close. This will be the third year that we've been involved with soccer, and the fifth time I've coached Big Brother's team.

And it's snowing again. It got just warm enough today to melt most of the snow, and as of my last smoke break, it was snowing again. I had to hide in the garage.

We did have at least one practice last spring in the snowfall. I would prefer not to have to again, as the novelty wears off really quickly.

I'm getting excited with the coming season. I love coaching the kids, though I don't know how well I'd do with older kids. At the U8 level, I feel I do a great job. With kids this age, if you can have fun with them, if you can let them see your love of the game, it seems to bring some of the same out of the kids.

I want my teams to want to win just as I want to win, but there's so much more than that, so much that's more important. I ask that they learn and that they do their very best. I explain to them clearly that all I want is there very best. I trust that if they and I give our best to the team, we will all learn, we will all have fun, and we will win more than not. I hope that I can have the parents transmit that same ideal to the kids also.

With the parents in mind, I want one day to defeat the worst soccer cheer ever, "KICK IT!" which is too often really not what you want from your team. In a sense, we want to insist that they do kick the ball as that is the main form of motation on the field. But random kicking of the ball is very counterproductive. I'd love to nicely convince the parents that the majority of the cheering regimen should be the following few phrases, where appropriate:
-OFFENSE!
-CONTROL!-This one is my big one. To me, the entire game revolves around issues of control
on many different levels.
-GO ___(name of team/child)___!-I really want to teach healthy levels of both personal
repsonsibility as well as the unity of the team as a unit.
-DEFENSE!-never to be underestimated is a strong defense that is aware of it's value, especially in soccer when so much emphasis is on the attacker.
But I can't come up with a way of suggesting this that I'm sure that I would be okay with hearing. I'll continue to consider this.

I really am excited to meet my team. This is our first all boy team, and I'm curious if I should expect it to be that much different from a similar group of boys and girls. I get to spend tomorrow trying to catch up with all the families to let them know when we start practice. Then I'm basically done for a week in which I wish fervently for good weather and find a book at the library to get me fully into a coaching mindset.

rant about Momma's job

If anyone cares, I am one of those non-outside-employment types lately. I am a cook by experience and trade I suppose, as is Momma. This gives me extra insight to her own job issues. I know restaurants, to an extent.
She is finally the boss, the head chef finally being demoted to no more than just head chef. When Momma finally got home from work last night (early as shit this morning actually) we were discussing the latest screwup by HC (head chef.)
He called in on a Saturday night, just over a week ago, because of the "threat of snow." There was no snowfall till well after he would have left work, so . . . But that's not as bad as what he pulled the previous week, and I just found out last night. I'm a little pissed off that the owner didn't step in for this which, in my mind, is worse than the call in.
What did HC do that was worse? He got a phone call from his wife because her car was broken down, so he left work at least two hours early, and it's closer to 2-4 hours early, considering that your scheduled time out in a restaurant is generally more ideal than concrete.
Should he not have left work to help his wife? I'd want similar consideration if my car broke down. The problem is that she wasn't stuck anywhere. She wasn't stuck on the highway. She wasn't stuck in a bad part of town. She was stuck at home! AT HOME!!! and HC left early so that she wouldn't be stuck at home.
We have one running car. I'm stuck at home most every day Momma works.
Oh well, I guess now we know why my hot wife is the boss now!

rockin' out and surfin'

Yeah, that surfin' I mentioned would definitely be the internet. The only waves in this part of the country are of a most painful orange hue.
I do love rockin' out and most especially when I'm on the computer. Considering the computer is the best cd player in the house, it get's used a lot. Now that I've discovered today's links, I may have that much more trouble getting away from the computer.
If you like rockabilly, surf, blues, et cetera, all the greatest of the American musical forms, or if you want an education, you should certainly check out Border Radio. I haven't listened to anything else at the computer since I first saw them on Myspace. I can't even begin to keep up with all the people I've never heard of before that I'm hearing on here.
I wondered earlier today if their were a way to get itunes to not always disappear. Sometimes I want to stop/pause the music right away. It's often pretty loud, and I need it to totally disappear for a moment when either Momma or the boys need to talk to me. So Big Brother is sitting at the table talking, not realizing that I can't quite hear him. By the time I'm down to the itunes button and have it open and have the music stopped he has to repeat himself.
Hmmm, I began the thought process. I wonder, I thought, if there is a way to have a little controller that is alway visible even when their is a browser window open. My next stop, logically for once, was straight to the Firefox extensions page. Sure enough, exactly what I wanted, and here it is. Foxy tunes is so cool! I'm done now before I start gushing.

name for translations

I found something interesting while doing my usual screwing around on the computer.
It should be understood that when I mention translations to English that don't quite say what they mean, I in know way intend this to be making fun of anyone. I do find it humorous, but I also understand that, if I were to go to a foreign, non English speaking country, I would be the one mispronouncing the words and sounding funny.
I've actually had my English corrected by a Mexican coworker. Being from Atlanta, I often leave out the second "t" when pronouncing it, saying basically "Atlanna." My friend and coworker would then point out that, "Eet ees pronounced Ahtlahntah." To which I would answer, "No, I'm from there Saul, we actually pronounce it Atlanna."
Anyway, there is a word "Engrish" for the sometimes humoruos mispronunciations from our Asian friends. Our language and theirs are vastly different, and this Wikipedia entry explains better than I can.
Again, I do not wish to belittle anyone for their natural differences. Ignorant fools are funny sometimes, even if it's a sad kind of dark humor. People who are just different are just different, and difference, in my opinion, is a great way to find out about new and interesting people, and differences make us stronger.

another translation

I've posted once before about imported products and the text contained, the translation to English being the basic point. Often, the translation comes across as odd, especially considering the backward nature of our language, wood, would, thought, tough, dough, cough, sell, sale, sail, two, to, too. I won't even mention our random word additions from around the world that we now call English.
Here again, one of these items is a gift, a lovely gift from Italy of a bottle of crema de limoni, a lemon cream liqueur. Sadly, the bottle is rather small, but happily, it's a cool bottle to add to our collection of more stuff that's pretty and unnecessary.
AltaVista's Babel Fish translator tells me that "L'abuso di alcool nuoce alla salute" translates from Italian to English as "The alcool abuse nuoce to the health." Okay, alcool is obviously alcohol, and nuoce? Not sure. I tried to translate it by itself and got nuoce.
On the box that held the bottle, the text is almost entirely in Italian. In addition to the warning, it does tell us both "si serve freddo" as well as "to be served cold" and even "il se sert froid" for their French buyers.
What I like is the box's translation into English of the health warning, "To drink to excess damage health." It's almost advice, I think.
My friend that brought me this delightful beverage refers to it as lemonchello. She is an awesome friend. Should you ever find yourself near a bottle of this delightful stuff, you ought to grab it and go.
Our next item of the night is the paper wrapper from a pair of chopsticks. Momma and I went out without the boys. We went barhopping and appetizer eating. We had an absolute blast.
Here is the text in question from the wrapper. Believe me, I've read it a couple of times to make sure that I've misspelled properly and added the proper capital letters.

Welcome to Chinese Restaurant.
please try your Nice Chinese Food With Chopsticks the traditional and typical of Chinese glonous history and cultual.

BAMBOO CHOPSTLCKS PRODUCT OF CHINA

I'm assuming that cultual and chopstlcks are just misspellings. But glonous is a bit more open. My first guess would be that it should say glorious. But maybe it's just some crazy word added because some guy was tired and just not trying that hard one day. Maybe they also used Alta Vista and nuoce came back translated into glonous.
Mostly, I just love the welcome and the request that I enjoy my nice Chinese food and that I use chopsticks. We did enjoy our food, pot stickers and egg rolls there, some sort of duck breast thing and insanely large pieces of calamari at the next place.
I almost forgot that the initial laugh for my wife and me was the word glonous. Maybe we were giddy from being out together on a real date, or perhaps it was the fact that we were giddy from being out together . . .yeah, it seemed funny then.
Glonous-heehee!

I shelter my kids

Yes, I shelter my kids. And apparently that's a problem. What I should do is send them to school. At school, along with all that great learning, they will learn how to BE in the REAL WORLD. And this must be true because as we all know, schools are bastions of reality, the very home of realness. All things really real can be found through those doors.
Yes, I shelter my kids, and one day they will be forced into the daylight of grown up where they will be fully unprepared for life. Okay, someone needs to invent a way to type sarcastically, perhaps a universally understood font that would be read sarcasitally.
In real life, you will be shaken down daily for whatever cash you have in your pocket. By the way, this is not mugging, it's called bullying. In real life, your boss will make you raise your hand if you need to pee, even if he's kept you so busy doing meaningless work that you've had to wait a really long time and really need to pee. In real life, if you wear your favorite shirt and your coworkers decide it isn't cool enough, they will steal your back pack and kick it around the office.
Yes, I shelter my kids and will continue to do so. They will always have the benefit of this shelter until I'm too old to provide it, at which time, if I've done my job as a parent, they will be willing to help me find shelter.
In addition to sheltering my children from the violence and intimidation of the school, I am sheltering them from various bad attitudes. I'm sheltering them from racism and homophobia. My goal is not to raise children that feel sheltered or isolated. I want more for my children than the school can give. I want wide open frontiers, not brick walls and desks.
Yes I shelter my kids.

sorry Mr. Friedman

In my last post, I completely misspelled the name of the blogger from whom I got the idea for the blog I wrote. Okay, so I didn't actually misspell his name. His name is David and I referred to him as Robert. I'm guessing he's the only one who read the damn thing and probably only because he saw that I'd linked to him.
So, if David Friedman shows back up 'round these parts, I'm sorry that I couldn't manage to remember your name while clicking between tabs to try and get my info for the links. I'm really usually slightly brighter than that.
In my defense, I will say that Robert is a very nice name, and maybe you'd like to try it out for a day or two, which is not to demean David, also a nice name.
Actually, we can all just stick with the names we have. I think once we start name switching it's all just going to get silly.
And speaking of silly, I should also probably apologize for this entire post. I'm attempting intended silliness, but I really have my doubts as to the success.

school or not, the versus issue sort of

You can't compare homeschooled kids to public school kids. The experience is so fundamentally different that no angle provides a satisfactory view to make an honest comparison. The way that schools "work" has no real bearing on how homeschooling works, so the results should be expected to be different. When you approach your children as learners and you haven't taken the role of teacher, when children are not taught to rely on a teacher to gain what they need to know, when kids are allowed to decide for themselves what they need/want to know, you understand that the old ways, the school ways, don't prepare our kids for what they need and will want or what we want for them.
Unschooling, it must be understood, is not about what we, as parents, want or expect from our kids. We do have desires and expectations for our kids and that should not be discounted. But more than anything, we want for our kids to be self-actualized, self-motivated and able to satisfy their needs personally. They must then be able to figure out their own needs because they learn early that they don't have someone hovering in the background to be ready in a moment to tell them. We do hover in the background because we are parents and love our kids. They do know that we are there, even if we hide just a little in the shadows. Our kids learn that we won't butt in, but we are always there, at any time that they need us. And that is one more thing they learn, when they want to do it themselves and when they need to ask us or anyone for help.
Some people, in arguing against homeschooling, worry that, without being forced, kids will never learn certain things that are such a big part of what is considered education. That, through the experience of many homeschool/unschool families, has been proven to be a nonissue. Will kids learn algebra or physics or biology? Yes they will if they want to. What if they just don't want to learn those things? First, we should question the true value of forcing these subjects onto every child regardless of the child's desire. I have no use for these things in my average day. Many of us never use those subjects ever. However, some people cultivated a desire for something in life that required the knowledge of those subjects. Homeschooled kids also have desires. As they grow and grow older, they are very much able to see what they want in life. They find it easy to pick up the subjects that relate to their desire.
In the end, I want my kids to know that there isn't much in this world they have to do. They will do what they want, and they will learn how to do what they want. Anything I child finds interesting is something they can learn from. Children, as they grow, learn what they are good at and what they love. I want my kids to have the time to cultivate their desires. I don't want their adulthood to revolve around doing things they hate because they have to. So I won't teach them that life is like that. I will let them learn what life can really be and what they can really be. Should I worry about their ability to motivate themselves? Should I care if sometimes they don't want to do anything? Will they ever learn to work or to work through unpleasant aspects to achieve a goal? Well, Big Brother took time to learn how to ride a bike. He didn't like a lot of what happened on the way to figuring out the whole speed/balance combo. He fell down a lot. He skinned his hands and knees. The pedals barked his shins a few time. He knows how to ride a bike though because he kept trying. He suffered through physical pain and mental frustration to work toward a goal that had value to him.
This post was inspired by both this blog, Ideas, written by David Friedman, and the comments to this blog. I found the blog through the Carnival of Unschooling.

homeschooling children to be social gimps

I shouldn't bother to link to the idiot because he doesn't need the readers. Some people should just save their blogs to their hard drive and not bother actually posting this shit. Chris O'Donnell introduces us here to several bloggers' Idiot of the Day.
Are homeschooled children social retards? Are they so sheltered that, at 18 years old, when they are released, they have no concept of how to interact with the real world? Of course, if you listen to the idiots that are all "knowledge" and no experience, then we are damning our kids to a life of social retardation.
Well, we don't really keep our kids in the house sitting around the Bible. We don't release our kids into a world they haven't dealt with their whole lives. We also don't warehouse them in an age segregated school setting that has no bearing on "real world" reality.
I'm not christian and am not homeschooling my kids for religious reasons. I know full well that, as an involved and loving parent, I could easily teach my children what I consider to be my morals if they were in gschools. But my and my wife's morals, such as they are, are part of why we chose to homeschool. We model appropriate behaviour so that our kids know they are more like other people than more different, and that, to me, is a most highly desirable trait. Even if the education didn't suck, the other things they learn are contrary to our beliefs. We are raising our kids to be open, loving, caring, accepting, understanding, things that are belittled in the competitive and cliquish culture of gschools.
Do I know enough to be able to teach my kids all that they will need to know? I'm just as able to do so as probably 90% of the teachers they would face in gschools. But what about math and science? This is a big "DUH" in my opinion. The math and science they would get in school is laughable at best and in my opinion actually damaging more often than helpful.
The things kids are supposed to learn in school, academically speaking, are things that anyone can pick up, given the ability to learn as they are interested. The math and science they will use is all around them, so how better to learn than through use and desire?
I'm happy with my kids being "social retards." I have long felt, as has my wife, like a social retard. I grew up, as did my wife, attending schools. We have taught ourselves more than all the teachers we ever had combined. We've also, sometime after reaching adulthood, come to a place where we feel welcome socially, and it's called not giving a crap what people think. Schooled children have more trouble learning that, if they ever learn that, because school is all about forcing all the pegs to fit in the same shape hole. Homeschooling is about finding the hole that is the same shape as you and deciding whether it's right for you.
School is not real. School does not present life in a way that can be considered realistic. School is a damaging and unpleasant place that doesn't prepare people to interact with other people in sensible socially relevant ways. Homeschool kids are different socially as are all people, but they have the added benefit of knowing that their difference, much like everyone else, is part of their uniqueness and is a desirable quality.
And finally, if your "proof" about anything is anecdotal evidence, then it really isn't truth. Opinion is not a valid arguement, and saying homeschooling is or isn't something doesn't make it true.

more on TN snow man

I just talked to a friend who reminded me of another attribute of the TN snow man. He sits alone on a green and brown lawn sadly bereft of snow. In some climates, snow men are fairly easily built. Here however, if we've taken the time, made the effort to build the best snow man we can, we find that we've used up our allotment of snow.

and now . . .

It's actually both snowing and sticking. The street in front of the house is fine so far, but if it get's cold enough it could be pretty icey in the morning. And not going to the grocery store tonight like we were supposed to means we really have to get up tomorrow morning. I may just go by myself when Momma gets in from work.
It's supposed to be sunny again tomorrow meaning the snow will look nice tonight and be mostly gone in the morning. We'll see.
We seem to get one decent snow per winter. It's just enough to roll up a dirty little TN snow man with leaves sticking to him, about half the size of those you might see on television in that perfect winter. Most of the snow is melted within a day or two. But there are always those lingering patches that you realize just don't ever get sunlight. There's plenty of places like that around here.
I know there are plenty of places that get real snowfall, and I've even seen pictures of those places. But I really don't care. One decent one a year is plenty for me. Just one day to watch the snow through the window, one day to watch it flying at the windshield and I'm done. I appreciate it and am glad to see it for a time.
Now the weird part? Between this end of the house and the property line is our driveway which runs perpindicular to the house. The bit of driveway directly beside the house is the only part of the driveway on which the snow is collecting.
Here's another link, not nearly as funny as the last two however, NOAA, my weather source. I have it bookmarked to go directly to our zip code. It beats having to see the local goofball weather guy.

rap jay y bob el silencio

Maybe you have to be a fan of the movie, maybe not. For all the random Spanish I might know, it's really not speakable Spanish so much as restaurant lingo. The hard part for me here is trying to remember the original bit that Jay says. So here are both. They do say the F word a lot (seriously, a lot) and a few other choice things. If you don't like it, I'd suggest you not click either link. Is it just as offensive en Espanol even if, though you don't understand, you know what they are saying? I kind of hope so!
So, rapping courtesy of Jay, I present

Jay and Silent Bob

Jay y Bob el Silencio

myspace and free speech, East TN edition

Is it the newest way in which Myspace is evil, or is this one just first ammendment?
I showed up at Grandmother's house with Momma and the boys for supper tonight. Her Sunday paper was spread about, and the front page blared bright with the newest story about everyone's favorite site.
There are a couple of stories here that stood out to me. Basically a number of high school students from this area have been punished for comments made on Myspace. Apparently the kids were using their own computer, their own time, at home. The other instance involves kids making a fake profile of a teacher and being inappropriate with some comments.
These are two different things. The first instance to me is a clear violation of the kids' first ammendment rights. The schools don't send their roots far enough into the family? Now we have this kind of thing to worry about? As with many issues, this is almost less about this particular instance than it is the power this gives the school in the future.
In the second story, I don't think this has anything to do with the first ammendment. These kids were entirely in the wrong. This does show a problem with Myspace. I've seen profiles hijacked by what amounts to Myspace hackers. In addition, as the news story mentions, Myspace can't tell if you are lying to them. I can't say I know enough about the law to say exactly what I think these kids did. I'd be pretty pissed if someone did this to me.
I have some female friends on Myspace who learned quickly to limit the personal information they put out. Sadly, too many of us guys are basically assholes when we know the girls can't actually see us. This is an instance where a lie on a profile page saves some people a bit of annoyance.
Of course I've also seen profiles where a person claims a certain age, but by reading their page you can learn that they are most likely a few years younger. I'd love for parents to keep their kids off of Myspace for the most part, but I've made that point before, so I won't force it now.

reason number ?/aka, take it where we find it?

Just over a year ago we got a card in the mail informing us that a friend had purchased for us a gift subscription to Seed Magazine. I wasn't sure at the time what to expect.
Sometime thereafter the first copy arrived in the mail. Seed describes itself with the slogan, "Science is culture." The magazine does present, in each issue, a number of interesting science stories. The current issue, February/March 2006, has an interesting article about Elizabeth Gould and her work with at the Princeton University Department of Psychology in neuroscience and neurogenesis, the creation of new brain cells. Her work with marmosets has brought new insight into how the brain develops.
While reading this article, one bit jumped out at me.

When a brain is worried, it's just thinking about survival. It isn't interested in investing in new cells for the future.
On the other hand, enriched animal environments-enclosures that simulate the complexity of a natural habitat-lead to dramatic increases in both neurogenesis and the density of neuronal dendrites, the branches that connect one neuron to another.

Keep in mind that the research here was done on marmosets. However, I can see the link to humans, but my first leap is toward the homeschooling family as I read those lines.
By providing the loving environment, along with a variety of resources and interaction with the real world that are inherent to proper homeschooling, we are helping our kids' brains grow. The common public school classroom on the other hand causes stress, and it therefore leaves the brain to often in a fight or flight response condition.
The article further mentions that too much stress, especially at a young age, not only retards neurogenesis in childhood but also trains the brain to continue this unhealthy lack of growth.
This information could be used to describe a number of societal ills. Elizabeth Gould herself, according to the article, ". . . prefers to focus on the strictly scientific. . ." However, the article also mentions her interest in questions of poverty in relation to her research.
With the homeschool mindset that guides my focus these days, I saw in this what I would have looked for. I'm not a scientist and can't say that I'm right. But based on the article, it's at least something to think about.
And thinking about this, I feel that I have yet another goal toward which to work. I want my kids to have open minds. I want them to have a healthy sense of self and of right and wrong. I also want them to experience a life of newness, learning and neurogenesis.

library class?

"We thought that since we have home-schoolers, we'd just try to show them how to use the library, because [the students] don't get that if they're not in school," Berry said.

This from an article here, which I found at Home Education and Other Stuff, a great read if you homeschool.
The article was really long and wordy, and honestly, I've read enough today to have not bothered with the entire article. Plus, having gotten to the quote above, I just had to hop over here and write/rant this.
I've got half a mind to give it the old, "Oh no she didn't!" rant, but that gets us nowhere. So instead I'd like to just say that, as homeschoolers, we are generally familiar with the library. Many of us spend much of one day a week at the library. Sometimes we even call it library day, so quaint. We know how to search online for books, how to use the hold/reserve option and even a little something about Dewey and some sort of decimals.
Add to the fact that we homeschool, or home educate as some prefer. By nature we see things to teach our kids. We find interesting tidbits to share, as if the whole world were a knowledge buffet. Wouldn't we then teach our kids about the library? When do kids in schools visit the library? Do they have library class?
We like the library and have fun there. We're there so much the staff recognizes us. Sometimes we run into other homeschooling families we know. Sometimes we see people we don't know, but we can tell they homeschool.
I'm not saying the program in the article is a bad thing, but I love those misguided sentiments that seem to think homeschoolers need help at the library. Honestly, the library is pretty self explanatory, even if you were to just wander in off the street having never been inside one before.
I'm done near ranting, because if I dwell on that quote . . .
Oh no she didn't . . .

iron chef america

I don't really like the American version of Iron Chef. I do however adore the original Japanese show. I have an especially soft spot in my heart for Morimoto, my all time favorite Iron Chef.
I really wish that the episode that I am now kind of watching were just a ploy to get Rick Bayless across kitchen stadium to stick a knife in Bobby Flay's ribs.
I just don't like Bobby Flay. I never have. Back when he was grillin and chillin, I always waited for the other guy to just whip his ass one day. I don't even remember the other guy's name, and I'm not googling it right at the moment either. Chances are though that if there were such a thing as justice he'd have the contract with Food Network and not that butt nugget Flay.
I would like to see Flay and Jamie Oliver fight. That's one of those moments that would just truly be golden. Of those two, which is the biggest geek? I can't really say the things I most want to about these guys as I'd like to keep this whole thing at least PG-13ish. I'll say honestly that I could take them, probably not at once as I just don't trust either of them in a fight. But seriously . . .
I'm not sure about Bayless. When I've seen him on some cooking show . . .hmmm, have I ever?
I kind of feel sorry for Alton Brown when I watch this. It seems as if he sold himself to get the good show, and then some evil corporate overlord came up with the idea to make Iron Chef suck, looked through the pile of contracts for souls and picked poor old Alton.
Anyway, chalk the rant up to disgruntled jealousy. I'm sure that's what it is. Okay, it's mostly that Bobby Flay sucks, but there's also the disgruntled jealousy.

almost soccer season

Sitting under my left hand and the left side of the keyboard are the forms to register Big Brother and myself for the spring soccer season.
I've been coaching his various teams since his second season making this roughly our third year. We have two eight week seasons, spring and fall, so it's been about six seasons. As well as coaching, I have played on an adult team a few times in the last three years. I totally missed playing this past fall as the season snuck up on me while I waited for the phone call. Apparently a bunch of my teammates played a summer season and needed a break, so our team didn't quite form in the fall. Nice of the bunch of butts to bother calling.
I played some high school soccer when my tiny private/christian school grew too small to field a football team. I did play one season of football meaning I practiced hard all season and played roughly 20 seconds of the very last game. We did in fact suck. The last of the guys big enough to play graduated that year, so we switched to soccer for the next school year. Again, we sucked.
I also played basketball, but that has yet to come up really, though Big Brother may want to play more sports as he is now seven years old.
Momma and I, being the good punks that we claim, have been sort of anti-sport. I didn't have great memories of my sporting days, though none of the horrid jock stories some kids have. She just never cared much for sports.
I also claim my Atlanta based childhood as driving me to anti-sport type attitudes. That's a whole other rant for a whole other day though.
Add all this to the baseball strike a few years ago and Michael Jordan ruining basketball and the fact that I never really like football to begin with.
Even so, I always remember remembering soccer fondly. Now that it's become a part of our lives, I've grown to really love the beautiful game.
I need to pretend to exercise a little, try to be in shape for next season. I'm not a bad player all things considered, and even without being in shape, I can build up some small amount of stamina over the course of the season. I'm not in horrible shape, no extra weight or major health issues. I could stand to stop smoking of course, but I play with guys that will light up at half time regardless of whether or not we have subs that day.
I'm getting more and more excited. Even just proofreading through this thing is working a little magic. I need to scoop the yard of the dog placed landmines. It's pretty dangerous out there in the winter as I'm a lazy s.o.b. But once I get that little scent of soccer on the horizon, it's time to get scooping. You'd think the other scents inherent to the current dog based issue would be enough of a force, but it doesn't really work the kind of odorous magic one would expect. Also, see "lazy s.o.b." above.
Now, I wonder if John Holt wrote any books about coaching youth soccer . . .

is myspace evil, or is it those damn kids?

Some homeschool moms have discovered Myspace and got freaked out by it. Some of the kids they found talked dirty, discussed drinking and drug use at parties, have "friends" with booty pictures. Some of them found personal information that could lead a pervert straight to their innocent daughters.
Is Myspace evil? Myspace is nothing more than any number of websites that were designed for the intended purpose of adult socialization. One could argue that it's no different, basically, than Blogger or even HomeschoolBlogger. The main difference is the open nature of Myspace in that it doesn't specifically cater to any single demographic or group and is newer, fancier, full of music and pictures and yes, booty.
I will admit that the shot of panties, booty and a little bit of a plaid skirt is a nice diversion. These pictures are racey, but the site does work to keep actual nudity out. A lot of the booty shots can take one directly to a link to a site off of Myspace where one can see even more. I've also found that the wrong word in a Google search can bring some unintended viewing.
Due to the open nature of Myspace, one is always a click or two away from a picture of booty. One is never more than a click away from something personally questionable at any time the computer is online.
Is there evil at Myspace? Well, I'd personally say that any evil is in the horrible pages you people's kids are putting up. The evil is in all those annoying glitter letters and the Fallout Boy song that starts playing when I click the link. And if you want, you can set your child's Myspace profile to members only, and no one not on their friends list can get in.
Myspace has groups of all sorts, people of all sorts, pictures of all sorts. After joining, members are invited to customize their profile page, to seek out "friends," join groups (basically boards, kinda like at Yahoo) upload pictures, blog. Everyone typically has an avatar, many people opting to use an actual picture of themselves or a family picture. These images are sort of your face at Myspace and can be just about any image you choose to upload to the site.
Friends, in Myspace terms, is a really loose term. On my page you might learn that, in addition to my wife, my friends include the Reverend Horton Heat, Rosie Flores, Fatlip, The Debonaires, and even more bands that I don't really know. As well you will find friends that I've known for years, some close by and some hundreds of miles away. It's a neat way to find people with similar interests, to listen to music and read some really varied blogs. You can use a variety of searches to find actual friends who may also be on Myspace.
I have no good segue to my next issue. I'm astounded at parents "learning" shocking things about their kids. If your children are on Myspace, are friends with booty picture people, like to attend parties with drinking and drugs, how are you not already aware of this? How has your family gotten to a point where you are hiding things from each other? Do you ever look past the booty pictures at the child and figure out the initial motivation? Do your kids just like being sneaky and hiding things?
I sincerely hope that I and my wife and our children can always be open and honest with each other. I hope we can always be close enough to share our interests and our hopes and our fears and our problems.
If you want, visit Myspace and see for yourself. Go to my profile if you want to. You can see the homeschooling groups there while your visiting. It's free! Why not?

how's them limits comin?

How many days straight has Big Brother not even bothered getting clothes on? and would he bathe if I didn't make a point of it? Maybe I should take him grocery shopping in his pajamas, or to the library.
How much candy can a child eat at 2.5 years old? Can he eat his weight in candy in one day?
How many random snack/meals can I come up with to feed them? This one, while having no answer, has been fun to ask. In and amongst the candy feeding frenzy we have managed to get some amount of noncandy food into two little bellies.
Tomorrow is Momma's late night. She doesn't go into work until 5:00, so I'm forcing the rest of us, and her if she wants, out of the house to do something. I don't do outdoors and cold, so maybe we can squeeze in the library visit we seem to keep missing.
random ramblings . . .off . . .now!

transition part B

I'm not new to homeschooling or the concept of unschooling. I have delved into unschooling more lately and have been finding a lot of truth in the philosophy.
In the wide world, homeschoolers are often seen as sort of outside the mainstream. Within homeschooling circles, we unschoolers are often the outsiders. The rest of the world has plenty of opinions about unschooling when they first hear about it. The entire concept runs counter to what society believes about childhood and education.
Unschooling is really simple. Trust your kids to learn. Parent them without controlling them. Offer them everything you reasonably can, also known as the real world. Children are born learning and will always learn assuming some outside agent doesn't step in and try to teach.
As I transition, I find that I just cannot agree with so much that I see. I feel like an outsider in more ways than just as an unschooler.
I see this most evident in my internet usage patterns lately. A lot of boards I used to visit just don't quite appeal to me anymore. So many parents that I used to feel camraderie with I no longer feel comfortable discussing things with if the discussion is at all about children. I can't give them answers they want to hear when the discussions lean toward kids or parenting issues. The answers I do have can bring out some pretty intense debate, disagreement even anger in other parents.
I don't claim to have all the answers, but even just a different opinion is sometimes enough to skew an entire topic. Very often, the unschooling point is that different opinion.
This is the side of the transition that I expect to have the most fun with. We've never been like the other families, and now we are even less like other families, or are we just like less families? I don't know if I care honestly. I do care about my kids, and they and my wife are the people I care most about. So they are the people that whose opinions I'm going to concern myself with.
And each day I will be a better parent. Each day my kids will see the options they have. We will grow and learn and love while relaxing and playing. We'll watch movies and eat candy if we want to.

transition part one

Very middle? Still just beginning? Near the end?
I am in the middle of a personal transition from being a controlling father always on the verge of shouting, or worse, to bcome a father that doesn't do those things.
I'm blaming it in part on "those unschooling women" as I put it to my wife. She sees what I'm trying to do, and we are still both coming to terms with it. We need to discuss it and come together on it, but we have time.
I wrote about limits recently, and part of the philosophy behind unschooling is removing limits. TV is not inherently evil and doesn't breed zombie children. Candy isn't a drug and will not make junkies out of children. These are not the only limits parents tend to place on kids, but these are the two that seem the hardest to get passed for people new to unschooling.
As part of our/my transition, we have had total candy days lately. We stopped saying NO to The Boy when he asked for candy. We offered other options and prepared other options. He was able to eat what he wanted. Big Brother has had the same removal of limits and has enjoyed some candy. His big thing has been Pokemon on the Gameboy for days (weeks?) and stopped today to watch a movie.
Basically, I've decided that rules won't make us happy. They are basically an invented reason to fight your kids. We have decided instead to follow a couple of basic principals. We respect each other and we don't tear up the house. Those cover basically anything that we are truly concerned about without having a whole list of unreasonable demands on the boys and what they do with their time.
The hard part is what Sandra Dodd refers to as voices. We all have those voices of parent and grandparents telling us what we should do, how we should parent. Sometimes those voices are actually physical, maybe over the phone, maybe just memories. Those voices might also just be other homeschooling parents telling us about their "right" way. Wherever those voices come from, they often tell us things that are incorrect, unhelpful, or worse, damaging to our relationship with our kids and family.
The hard part is stopping what you did do, how you were, in order to do a better job. I see the importance of what I'm doing, but that doesn't make it easier. I've never been one to listen to those voices, but some of them have slipped through and seemed to make sense. In addition, some of the tools my parents used were tools I didn't want to use. I did use some of them that I didn't take the time to consider.
So I'm basically at a point where I'm reassembling my tool box. I have to rethink so many actions and reactions and decide each time how I really want to behave. Nothing can be allowed to just come out or just happen. Nothing just happens as a parent, though we often don't take the time to think about what we do.
I'm no longer a reactionary parent, and each time I think through something, I find that I and my boys are happier for it. I can't help but wonder about the transition. Will I ever be through it? or should I just stop looking at it as such? I'm guessing that what I'm doing now is just the opening bell of what's to come. Instead of finishing the transition, the transition will just open up into the rest of our lives.

the limited homeschool

Some people homeschool as a limiting agent. I read a comment to a blog earlier today in which a mother proudly stated the things to which her children have no exposure. Admittedly, many of this type of homeschooler is choosing to home educate due to religious belief. And in a sense, I can completely understand this motivation. I often see our family's motivation in a similar but different sense.
There are aspects of a public school education that I do want to limit our exposure to. I say "our" because the children aren't the only losers in the public schools. I can rant about the family dynamic being ruined by gschools some other time.
I want to limit my kids' sexualization to a naturally ocurring part of human life. I don't want the disaster-waiting-to-happen that I see as natural in the setting of public schools whereby children are exposed to sex in a most unhealthy and bizarre situation.
I want to limit my kids association with drugs. My own stance on drugs is actually very liberal. I can rant about the war on drugs on a whim, but I don't want to drop my kids into one of our nation's largest arenas for drug sales.
I want to limit the exposure to my family of the entire school system. When I pass schools, I have pictures of buzzing lights, stress and tiredness, and the fact that everything outside the window is so much better than sitting at this damn desk. I see boring or mean or stupid teachers outnumbering the good ones, the nice and intelligent teachers, the ones you hear about but don't always meet.
I want to limit my kids exposure to the attitudes bred in the public schools. I want to give them broad open avenues full of choices and experiences. I want to offer them all music, not limited to what their "friends" at school tell them is cool. I want them to see art and spend time with it, gazing at it as much as they want. I want to give them warm sunlit corners and long books. I want to give them Fats Waller and Hank Williams in the same day The Clash and Mozart.
Homeschooling shouldn't be about limits. Schools are places of limits and raising hands and walking in line. We limit our actions based on mutual respect both as parents, kids and homeschoolers. Beyond those limits, we have a whole borderless world. We can stay at home and play video games or we can go do something. And in the end, my limits aren't really very limiting. If anything they allow for even greater variety in our options which is the point.

about what I said . . .

Yeah, I reread what I wrote about Jamie Oliver and his cookbook, and had some thoughts. First, considering the term "faggoty haired," I don't want people to think that I don't like gay people. I think that gay people are basically just like straight people. I could be wrong, but essentially, booty is booty, chocolate/vanilla and different strokes. So why say "faggoty?" Because there just isn't a better way to describe that hair.
Second, I have to say that Momma actually likes Jamie Oliver. I assure her that it's okay. She's also flipped through his cookbook, which brings us to number three.
I still haven't checked out the recipes. I imagine it's a bunch of upscale restaurant crap that I won't actually cook at home. That being said, it is a cookbook, and I will end up checking it out. I will readily admit to anything I end up cooking and will be fair.
To be fair, the guy needs a comb. Seriously! But I can't fault him having a cool job.

bush-9/11

Apparently, everything Bush has done, including treating the American public like idiots and stomping on civil rights is working. The arguement? We haven't been attacked since 9/11, so the warmongers must be doing something right.
Right?
Well, I'm sure that makes sense, in Bizarro World. But here in America, we used to demand just a bit more. We used to be a country that was based on freedom, on the rights of each man, woman and child.
I've been sneaking out at night to peak in our neighbors' houses. I don't tell them about it, but I carry a small step ladder with me, just in case, and I peak in their windows. I'm sure they are all out to get me because someone, several months back, tossed a chunk of concrete garden border into our yard, breaking part of a small street lamp type light fixture.
After I peak in their windows, I snoop through their trash. If I can, I rifle through their mail before they take it from the mail box.
It must me working, because I haven't had anything thrown at my house or into my yard.

They that can give up essential liberty for a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety. -Benjamin Franklin

This is my new favorite quote. My wife first introduced me to this quote which has been a favorite of hers for a while.
We are not a nation of babies that need our screams and needs coddled. We are a nation of free men and women. We are a nation founded on principals of equality and freedom and the desire to find our own happiness.
Children need protection, though sometimes they don't understand. Men and women must stand up, protect themselves and take the rights they deserve.
The Bush family and their cronies did not invent freedom nor did they give it to us. They can take it away, but only because we are letting them. We really have to blame ourselves when we let the current administration steal from us our liberty in the name of safety, and we can only blame ourselves when what they called safety turns out to be something much more sinister than just the greed for money and power that they display through their lies.
We didn't cause 9/11 and it isn't America's fault that some Muslim assholes misread their scriptures. We can blame Muslim countries for idling about while the terrorists besmirch their name, but we can't blame Islam for the failings and evil of some of that religion's adherents. Bush has not saved us from another 9/11, nor is he making us safer.
And as a post script, let me add that I don't really spy on my neighbors. I am a little nosy and peak out the window as they drive by, but I don't really snoop about and spy on them. Our self-important president does just that though. He snoops around, peaking at our stuff, sniffs our butts and taps our phones. He has lied, does lie and will lie.
Clinton lied about sex and got impeached. Bush lies about everything and has gotten several thousand Americans and Iraqis killed. How many innocent lives equal the cost of the pretend safety he offers?

good ol' Thomas

Imagine my surprise. Me, being the punk rocker that I am, never set out to enjoy half the things that appeal to me as a parent. There are those things you know about before kids come along, even if in passing, and I was somewhat aware that there was such a thing as Thomas the Tank Engine.
Big Brother had an extended passing fancy with trains, probably starting when he was between two and three, like The Boy. The wooden track was purchased for him in the pre-Boy years, though Thomas had not entered the equation at this point. Trains in general were a delight for Big Brother, and one that took a back seat to other interests as he got older. I won't say that he lost interest in trains, he just got older, and his world got bigger.
Credit The Boy with discovering Thomas. I'm not quite sure how it happened. We came to posess two Thomas videos which may have been the start. Thomas is now a phenomenon in our house. Big Brother is almost as crazy about it as The Boy, but he is also into it differently.
Big Brother is slowly memorizing Thomas. We got a set of the original Rev. Awdry Thomas books for The Boy for Christmas, and we've been checking out and wearing out videos from the library. The Boy watches the videos and Big Brother ends up watching as well. Then Big Brother reads the books. Of the episodes we've seen of which we now have the original story in the book, he can tell you the subtle differences.
So I hear Thomas in the background, and sometimes I sit to watch with the boys. I've really grown to love the Thomas stories. How can you not love Ringo Starr and George Carlin reading about cheeky tank engines?
I love the story of the Thomas stories. A parent makes up stories for their child based on something the child loves. The characters take on a life of their own. Somehow these stories are written and published. Because they are good stories, they become somewhat classics. I rank Rev. Awdry with A. A. Milne. Sadly, due to the proliferation of Thomas, I fear that the original stories get somewhat lost, much like the original Winnie the Pooh stories. I dare not go into that rant just now.
I forget now where I was going with this. The Boy, as per usual, is sleeping with Bill and Ben, having added Percy for tonight. It's always Bill and Ben in the left hand, and sometimes someone else in the right. On a tangent, homeschooling edition, Bill, Ben and Percy are all 0-4-0 saddle tank engines. Big Brother has taken a different Thomas toy to bed, but I forget the name of this one. He is the tractor that loosens the big boulder that wreaks havoc on the island.

some gifts that stood out

This is not to demean the gifts given, the givers or anyone else. I love my family and appreciate the thoughts behind the gifts. I can't pretend that I always buy the best gifts, though I'd like to think I am good at getting people stuff.
So why do these gifts stand out? They all have their own interesting facets, but these three were especially notable for the reasons listed.
Lets start with the coffee. When I say I am a coffee snob, this is not intended to indicate that I like small cans of flavored coffee from the WalMart "gifts for people you haven't taken the time to know" section. Having said that, I will flavor my own coffee if I want to, but I still appreciate that, knowing I like coffee, someone got me something they thought I'd like. However, the only reason I didn't send it home with Grandma is because I hadn't written this humorous blog yet. After reading, you may decide that I still haven't written a humorous blog.
The only corporate name on the coffee is Zavida. The ingredients are listed as "100% Arabic coffee, natural and artificial flavors. No sugar added. Does not contain any nut products."
So far all of that sounds good. It's Arabica as opposed to the lesser quality Robusto. There are neither sugar nor nut products. So allergy issues are placated. Of course, if there are no nut products, then how did they flavor the hazlenut vanilla and the amaretto almond?
Now for the next gift. Momma and I are both cooks, but I'm the cookbook junky. I do use my cookbooks, or at least I use two or three of the nearly fifty. The newest one is good old Jamie Oliver. I've never really liked that guy. He does bring a little gayness out of me, making me want to be his wife so long as my own wife doesn't find out. The cook book has maybe one recipe for every seventeen pictures of JO's faggoty haired ass. Comb your hair you dink! They have combs in the UK?
Anyway, the food pics are really beautiful, as you would expect. This is one cookbook that I may not use much, and I kind of feel for whoever bought it for us. I appreciate the thoughts, but it won't be nearly as useful as the giver hoped.
Last gift to wonder about:
City Kidz die cast free wheel racer. What does that mean? Basically dollar store knockoffs of Hot Wheels. I'm not so brand concious that I care, and they belong to the boys, so as long as they like them, I don't care. That isn't at all the point.
The cars were produced in China and imported by a Canadian company. Most of Canada is English speaking, so the messages on the cars aren't their fault. I have to wonder though how the Chinese company making/painting these cars came up with the slogans to print on them. They look like typical Nascar style race cars. Then when you look closely you start to wonder. So here I will list the things printed on these cars.
On the yellow car:
Extra! Extra!
53 Spain
Two Way Power
Ka Boom
Tunnel
Good Boy
New Recovery

On the black car:
Outdoor
Pall Grace (this is the name of the driver I'm guessing)
Wheaton College
Correction Unit
High Class
Corper Team
Fun!

On the red car:
Bang
First Aid
Cusyom Built
Histortroom
Condos that

Any misspellings or unclear words are copied directly from the cars. I honestly don't know what to think. I do wonder if the American version of toys for import to China have equally odd phrasings that leave Chinese parents scratching their heads as they hand the toy of to their child. From reading through them, several words seem as if a Chinese person heard the English words and used them. Maybe these are words that came up most often in some sort of Google search and got a bit tangled in translation.
Those are the stand outs. There are always some odd gifts. It is Christmas after all. The odd nature of the gifts in no way compromises the love I feel for my family and my inlaws. I appreciate them for more than their gift buying savvy, so please understand that these are not complaints.

right behind me, or buncha savages in this town

or Men Alone II: the KY Connection
Clerks is on Comedy Central. I should be playing some music, and we have lots of new stuff that we got each other for Christmas. But I can't help it.
I really do love this movie. Sadly, Kevin Smith's other movies don't quite seem to measure up to Clerks in my opinion. Don't get me wrong, I'm a fan of the man's films, but Clerks has this special something. It's one of those random movies that just hits so many different points.
I didn't really plan to blog about the fact that I can hear this movie and see it in my mind. Is that bad?
Having said all that, I'll soon end up running through the Kevin Smith library, those of his movie which I own.

Random thougt:
What is it in people that drives them to hold opinions with no actual knowledge of the subject of their opinion? It's easy to jump to conclusions based on hearsay. It's easy to let a small amount of "knowledge" guide your opinions. I think too often, the leaders in society just give the party line. That line changes based on the postition of the particular leader, teacher, preacher, family. As a homeschooler, I'm loathe to use the perfect example because, as most homeschoolers, I'm sick to death of the "S" word. But the socialization arguement really is a prime example of what I'm saying. People will argue about socialization, will listen to the truth in well reasoned arguements from people who are actually homeschooling, and they will still deny that socialization happens outside of gschools.
That isn't the point though. The point is that people will argue wrongly, full of faith in what they say. You will disprove their arguement with reason, with direct quotes from real studies, duplicated results, and they will offer the sermon or lesson against what they believe is wrong. You can go online to their local library and put the book on hold for them, and they often still won't admit the truth.
Okay, rant off.

Effin-A blogs!!! by crikey!
I can waste more time jumping from link to link, starting with a couple of blogs that I actually care to read regularly. Then there's that random (currently it's a cold) reason that the day is especially lazy. I can read more blogs and still clean the kitchen and feed the boys. I manage to holler at them just enough most of the time. I get a decent little bit of television/video game time. But if I got paid dollars per blog read, I could . . . pay off a debt maybe?

currently reading

With the cold weather, I don't spend as much time sitting outside. And when all my lazing is done inside, I tend toward the computer as opposed to a book. Nothing beats sitting in the shade on a hot day with good book and a St. Terese pale ale from Highland Brewing.
So, while I stand outside and shiver and smoke, I'm reading Rob Roy by Sir Walter Scott. He's one of those writers I'd never gotten around to reading. I have to think I was aware of his having written, though having searched the library, I realized I'm very ignorant about his work.
Big Brother and I recently read Kidnapped as his bedtime book. Searching around the internet for information about time and setting of that book I came across references to Scott.
This is a "why I love homeschooling" moment really. Sitting here with the boys, letting them learn, I have been reading some great books, finding resources based on current interests and learning. We don't always learn together, and it's good that we follow our own interests. But very often, our different interests tangle together in interesting ways.
At this moment, Big Brother is reading to TheBoy. They just read The Bike Lesson and are now reading some random book.
Big Brother recently reread The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. We read through the Narnia books together a while back. I first enjoyed my own escape into Narnia as a child and was happy to share these books with my own boys. We have yet to see the movie, and it's likely it will not happen in the theater. The Boy isn't willing to sit through anything that doesn't regularly feature trains. I'm fine with that and used to waiting for the rental.
I think I'll restructure my own day enough so that we just watch movies from now until decent weather. I often think about a movie, but I also think that we should do something productive. At this point I usually turn back to the computer to see if any of the blogs or websites have updates because it's been an hour since I last checked on Home Education and Other Stuff or Punk Parents.

one week more

That whole "having kids speeds up time" thing, that just messes with me sometimes. Just one more week till Christmas. The boys and I have been such complete shutins lately that it seems to have crept especially quickly this year.
I have now wrapped three presents and ordered one more for Momma earlier. It's one of those gifts that will have her name on it, but we'll all enjoy it. Then there's the loot for the boys.
I haven't thought once about cooking for any of the three days that our particular holiday is dragged out to. We'll have a lovely Christmas Eve and Day, two weeks of rest before we drive south for a couple of days for the last family Christmas one week into the new year. I try to make pralines once a year, but those don't fly in Atlanta due to nut allergies, and no one here wants to take as much as I end up making. I may try to halve the recipe, but that might not work at all. I need to make more candy and learn all the intricacies.
Momma keeps mentioning new tattoos for Christmas, and I'm quite certain she knows exactly what she wants. I have too many loose ideas floating around my head, unfinished bits of tattoo ideas that I can't quite settle on.
I've been getting sucked into homeschool blogs lately. I never realized just how many people are posting the same kind of crap as me. I didn't think of doing this without having found a few of course and thinking . . .obviously not a lot . . .maybe I can do this. The problem is that it's like walking into, and here I'm stumped. I can sit here and jump from one link to another, all the while using as my excuse, I'll just bookmark the good ones and come back later. Certainly I can scan through and learn if it's something I want to read again. I can end up with ten tabs open at the top of my page, which I will wade through, Xing out of most. In the end, I while away the day in an attempt to find some blogs that I'll actually find interesting, jumping up periodically to holler at someone or fix a snack. The only reading that isn't the computer happens standing outside the back door smoking and shivering or taking care of a certain type of business best not mentioned.
So goes the past week I suppose. I haven't even written anything here because I keep reading blogs! I suppose that's how they get you.

slowing down

I don't know that slowing down is the right word for it. I've been moving pretty slowly since the end of monetarily fulfilling work for me. I think I remember a spell of laziness that I considered to be a bit of relaxing.
At some point in time, I could no longer honestly suggest that I was really being anything other than lazy. The house was getting messier and even dirtier in some areas. I've caught Momma one too many times cleaning things that I should have done. She works hard enough, so my lazy ass really needs to scrub the damn toilet.
The slowing down of which I speak is more what unschoolers might call deschooling. Mostly, I'm relaxing my attitude toward a lot of things having to do with the boys. I'm rethinking the concept of rules, making my expectations of them make sense. I've long known I need to work on the yelling and being angry dad.
I've always felt that I needed to expect a certain level of everything from the boys. I've demanded a lot of them that I never needed to. I've forced levels of behavior that are often ridiculous. Now I'm trying to undo some of that. It's a hard moment realizing that you don't meet the expectations that you have for your kids.
Just these early tentative steps have been paying off. Momma has noticed that I'm nicer these days. I think I could have listened to her a few years ago and saved us all some trouble. She has been a little short with the boys, but I think a lot of it was my negativity being so much that it trickled down. Had I been more relaxed from the beginning, she would also have been. She has tried to show me before how I was being a butt, but I was certain I was right and probably argued my point better.
That's parenting. I certainly didn't ruin the boys. They're everything you could want in kids really. And we can all be just a little happier and loving toward each other. I'll do my part by expecting more of myself than I do of them. I'll model how I should be rather than telling them how I think they should be.

ham and cheese scones

From Food Network, this was actually Emerill's recipe for bacon and cheese scones. I used country style ham instead of the bacon and didn't include the green onions as I didn't want that flavor in my scones.
His recipe called for six ounces of cheese, but after I'd grated about four ounces, it seemed like almost too much. I'll have to make these again with the whole six ounces.
They turned out really good. Seriously, ham, cheese and a scone? Did you wonder if it was going to be good? Silly ass!
I have to wonder if it has to do with geographic location, but every time I make a baked quick bread, I find that I need slightly more liquid than whatever recipe I'm using. I think Alton Brown's biscuit recipe may be the one that came out right. However, everything from my mother's biscuit recipe to James Beard's biscuits always need more liquid in the end. I'll generally measure out whatever the recipe calls for and proceed with the mixing. I can never get everything moist/sticky/incorporated without adding more liquid. The liquid of course is generally milk or buttermilk, and I never need more than a tablespoon or two extra. But it seems that, without fail, all baked quick breads require this same tiny bit extra.
Batter bread, muffins or pancakes for instance, always seem fine, even though muffins are baked. So instead of baked throughout this, I should possibly have worded it differently. Am I going to change it now? Hell no! That would take . . .like work? . . .or something?
yeah . . .

ramen sans packet

Late night hunger and nothing quick, see chips, cookies, any random snack at all; so what DO we have?
Two packs of ramen noodles, somewhere between 2 and 3 cups of chicken stock, some venison, portabella mushrooms, green onions. I sliced everything very thin, all the better to mix in the noodles.
Go ahead and boil the noodles if you want. They only take 3 minutes so you could wait. Stir fry/sautee the mushrooms, onions and deer meat. Toss in a little garlic and ginger, also sliced thin. Toss in some soy sauce and fish sauce, basically deglazing the pan, adding a little sesame oil even because it's really lovely stuff. Add your noodles and some chicken stock. Consider the whole 3 minutes to cook thing, I could happily have thrown the noodles in at this point and cooked them rather than precooking them. It also would have even saved the energy and water I suppose.
I wasn't quite happy with it. I added some more soy sauce and a little oyster sauce in a great what the hell moment, both of which came together, Wonder Twins style, to finish the job. It was delightful.
The deer was left over from Thanksgiving. The rest of the things are pretty much pantry items, depending on what the menu for the week looks like. The boys are lucky come lunch time tomorrow when they get the leftovers.
We still have a small amount of the venison and plenty of turkey. Tomorrow may be turkey salad sandwiches, followed by whatever the Joy suggest for leftover turkey. Tomorrow is turkey clearance day. All leftover turkey must go.