Tuesday, January 30, 2007

blurgh

For me, part of blogging is that it's writing practice for me. Many years ago, I wrote a good bit, but I didn't then see my life as any sort of living, so I wrote stories through some internal filter that had watched too much crappy television.

As the years passed, I came to write less and less till I didn't even really do any writing more than a very few times a year. Even then it was generally just bitching, often about the fact that I didn't write any more.

Why do some people feel driven or drawn to writing? What is it that makes people do this and so often hate doing it at the same time that they feel compelled to do so? It isn't really like other endeavors in that you're so much more likely while writing to bare your soul in a way that people can really get at. I'm sure people involved in other mediums would argue that last statement, but fuck them.

Seems like I've found myself here plenty of times before, and every time I expend some price in stressful moments due to the situation, and every time, at the very least, I come up with some crazy rant from deep in my anus. And it's usually a rant that has no reason to suddenly be topical, but I really don't want to be the guy that gets his blog posts from someone else, though I'm never above that if the story is good enough.

And that's where I am for now. The only thing I can think of to write about is not being able to think of anything to write about. And if that keeps me from going too many days without posting, at least I can feel like I've finally written something just not crappy enough for now.