Tuesday, July 25, 2006

'cuz she asked so nice

Frankie loves these things, and I don't. But I do them anyway sometimes. So I'll do this one too, but only because my robot post was/is just too taxing to think about at this stage of the evening. I guess we'll just jump into it

What was I doing ten years ago?
Momma and I had been together just over a year at this point, little aware what this coupling would result in. We lived in a shady little shit hole on the side of a gravel parking lot belonging to what we were assured was the only lesbian bar in Rock Hill, SC. We were punk as fuck, and we stole their picnic table for our front porch, and I dug a belt out of their dumpster that I still wear and am in fact currently wearing. I should point out that, while I didn't actually aid in the theft of the picnic table, I didn't do anything about the situation beyond enjoy the picnic table. This was still the early days of my restaurant career in which I constantly promised myself that this job was certainly the last. Ten years ago may have been the summer that I worked as a laborer for a drywall company. That job sucked.

What was I doing one year ago?
Mostly what I'm doing now. Sadly, I was just as lazy about getting out and doing anything, and I was still to satisfied with sitting at the computer rather than do much else. It's a sad situation this, and one that I'm working on working on. I really am starting to waste the whole point of staying at home with the boys.

Really? five snacks that I enjoy?
1. Kettle Chips rippled, salt and pepper
2. Senor Taco's salsa bar
3. Moose Tracks ice cream
4. At the pizza place I used to work at we had black bean hummus. I used to spread that on a pita, top it with salsa and cheese and melt the whole thing in the oven. That was some good eating.
5. hard boiled egg dipped into a pile of salt and pepper

Do I know the words to five songs?
I've never been good at this, but I'm sure I can try.
1. Bankshot-Operation Ivy. So, it's the only lyric, almost, some guy shouting "BANKSHOT" over some of the greatest ska/punk ever.
2. Tennessee Stud-Johnny Cash, though written by Jimmy Driftwood, nonetheless, Johnny Cash most likely did it best.
3. Sunday Morning Coming Down-Johnny Cash yet again. This time we get Kris Kristoferson as the writer, who I'd like to hear do the song, but again, Johnny taught me the song.
4. I can't think of another song. Is it alright to look at the cd's laying around and find a song I know the words of? It seems like cheating, but I'm really just drawing a blank. Oh, Iron Man-Black Sabbath. But really, who doesn't know the words to Iron Man? seriously
5. Bales of Cocaine-Reverend Horton Heat. This is just a fun song, ain't no two ways about it.

Oh yeah, the five things millionaire question.
I'm the $2-4 a week powerball guy, so I think about this once in a while.
1. The debt would all disappear, possibly the most fun.
2. I'd show Momma and the boys a really great time in some really cool place. The hard part would be where to spend a little money somewhere in the world.
3. I imagine that we'd save plenty of money to move somewhere cool and open a restaurant that would then become our income so that we didn't end up like some busted ass lottery rich redneck left broke with a trailer mortgage and a dwindling supply of Harleys as the debts came due.
4. By this time I've become a good citizen, supporting NPR and donating whenever the guy in the fez shows up. We've invested the remainder of our million well and are able to take really great trips with the boys who are learning that their homeschool is global.
5. See number 4

I don't have five bad habits do I?
1. Smoking
2. I could drink a little less, but I could also not.
3. Internetting
4. I still shout way too much. I'm still working on it, and I'm hoping the boys notice it. But it just seems such a natural and unimpeded motion till I catch myself half way through. I'm starting to get the point earlier though, so I'm sure I'm slowly figuring out how to be less of an asshole.
5. Language! I think I caught The Boy saying a fave cuss word of mine recently. I did the "not pointing it out" thing. I'm pretty sure he cussed though.

Five things I like doing is totally easy. I totally like doing at least five things.
1. Drinking a bloody mary at brunch on a Sunday morning.
2. Playing soccer. I miss it, but I'm scared as the fall approaches knowing that I'm in no condition to play, that I won't likely become unlazy and that these haven't stopped me in the past.
3. Playing video games. I had a great time with Medal of Honor-Rising Sun, as Big Brother and I played the different levels together. That isn't an option on Frontline, the MOH newest to us, though not the newest version of the game. I try to be cool when we play versus each other and he beats me, but he does, and I'm not always.
4. Saying inane things to The Boy knowing the specific response I will get just to hear his delightfully funny way of saying certain things.
5. Going off with righteous, if misguided sometimes, indignation about just about anything. In real life, I'm always moments from a good fussing about random subject, especially if I've recently read about it somewhere, like a magazine.

Five items of clothing that I won't ever wear again?
1. There's the parachute pants that I got as hand me downs from a friend after they were no longer cool. The person from whom the pants had been handed down, upon my first time ever wearing parachute pants, a fashion statement that I'd longed to make, asked me if I was waiting for them to come back in style. And I had to wear those pants all night after that.
2. The Lucero shirt that shrunk in the wash, but it'll look fine on Momma.
3. The t-shirt from the christian school that occupied so much of my youth, though I also can't stand to get rid of it.
4. The boxers with the snaps that were an adult hand me down. I thought they were neat if pointless when I first saw them, but I'm forever sucking in my stomach to avoid unsnapping them whenever I need to do extreme vertical movements, as opposed to minor adjustments. That snap is tiny and hard to fasten sometimes, especially when some kid is screaming, and I just don't like them, the boxers. But they have a nice stripe pattern, so I hate to get rid of them, just in case.
5. The box of shirts sitting in the hallway needing to go to Goodwill when I next take the recycling. That's sort of cheating, but it is a box of things I won't wear again.

My five favorite toys? What counts as a toy?
1. My computer? Does that count?
2. Our tax refund stereo in the car. We finally have a cd player in the car! Which goes first, the Honda factory speakers or the kids heads?
3. Nintendo Gamecube
4. Wooden train track. We have a nice little pile of tracks, and I'm often frustratedly enjoying trying to build a big track, using as many pieces as possible while not ending up with a bunch of crap going nowhere. It can be a challenge. And I'm leaning toward Percy lately as a favorite.
5. I've run out of toys. I really have. Maybe I should use some of that million dollars from earlier on something cool.

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