idiotic grocer bagging

I've mentioned at least once before what has become a constant source of irritation in my life. Of course, I've mentioned many constant sources of irritation, but the jackassery that is grocery bagging at the local store just astounds me.

This is the list of items I purchased at the store: one six-pack Highland Brewing Company Oatmeal Porter, one package extra firm tofu, one package Asian style bean sprouts, one bunch green onions, one zucchini, one package shittake mushrooms, one bag of dog food and one jug of automatic dishwashing detergent. There were also two packs of cigarettes, but those don't really matter in the bagging process. The cashier is as likely to hand them directly to me as she is to send them down the conveyor belt to the once retired bagger stealing his grandson's job because his guvment checks aint quite cutting it these days.

They always bag the beer, and I refuse to use the bag when the beer comes in a convenient carrying case, has a built in handle at the top, weighs several pounds and has corners at the bottom just waiting to rip through those bags and lose me my beer. Sometimes they double bag it, but they never don't bag it if I tell/ask them not to, so these times are extra wasteful.

The zucchini, green onions and bean sprouts were in one bag, and as I put them away after arriving home, I noticed that my mushrooms weren't there. I worried at first that I'd left them at the store, and I thought about it for a moment, making sure that I had indeed purchased mushrooms. I've not gotten mushrooms plenty of times as the more exotic mushrooms often don't sell quickly in this part of town. They sometimes get a little old, and I passed over some oyster mushrooms recently when I saw the funk exuding onto the inside of the package.

My mushrooms and tofu, both of which could easily have been in with the produce, were in the same bag as the dish detergent. Why? I really don't know, but perhaps Grampaw Baggem counts out the items and loads the bags by number of items as opposed to a much more intelligent system whereby produce and chemical agents don't inhabit the same bag. All the produce and the tofu combined weigh less than the detergent, which would also be a sensible concept to keep in mind when bagging.

So that's my rant du jour, assuming I don't swing back by with some more pissoffedness. Damn, I just went and made up another Harold Ford Jr. word. I'm now going to the garage to create an aura of ensmokedness with a cigarette.

And in case anyone cares or was wondering, a stir fry. The mushrooms, zuchini, green onions and tofu, but probably not the bean sprouts. I don't know what I'll do with them.