Due to privacy concerns, I'm sure it's not likely, but I'd like to get hold of the last person to check out Samurai 7 from the local library. I've just watched all of the first episode while folding some laundry, and I was going to watch episode two while finishing up and figuring out how to avoid doing the really important thing I need to actually be doing.
Early on in the episode the dvd froze a couple of times, but then at a fairly climactic moment it seemed to give up, the player not quite able to get through whatever damage had been done to this poor disc.
I pulled it out and took it to the kitchen sink without really looking at it at first. I rinsed it quickly, thinking it might not need too much cleaning.
And now I want to contact the library and register some sort of complaint about the assbutt that last viewed this dvd. But more importantly, I want to call him/her up and discuss it, because it really looked, from the thumbprint, as though they lifted the disc out of their player with the jelly donut they were eating, rather than waste time putting it down. Keeping in mind this is still just a theory.
None of that contacting this jerk is actually going to happen, so to whoever it was, wherever you are, have some respect for your fellow library users and dvd viewers. At least put the nacho the rest of the way in your mouth before handling public property. Have some respect at least for the institution of the library and the free, week long loan of a dvd. Wipe your hands on your pants if you must, but at least try to find a clean spot.
p.s. spellcheck isn't happy that I'm not capitalizing dvd, but I do what I want.