Tuesday, February 28, 2006

my lent story

I'm giving up lent for lent.

Who am I kidding, I don't even know what the hell lent is. I think it's one of those crazy catholic holidays, but from what I've come to understand, when listing holidays, we should list lent under the "sucks" category.

I once had a friend give up liquor for lent. This didn't help her maintain any sobriety as wine and beer are not liquor. The year before she mentioned giving up caffeine. I'd just as soon beat up grandma with a baby than give up caffeine.

My religion, if I were to actually follow the Discordian teachings, would allow me, if I wanted, to take on an extra habit for lent. It's not in the Principia, but I'm sure it would be allowed.

To any good catholics out there, first, what the hell are you doing reading my craptastic blog? It's almost lent for christ's sake. Second, I don't intend to offend. I do accept that it is a natural tendency of mine to offend, and I don't actually care, but I don't intend to offend.

Okay, the sun is out, the day is lovely and my ass needs to be out going to stores and making purchases. The economy ain't gonna drive itself.

Rant for the day: I'm out of half and half. I have only had one cup of coffee today and am already out of half and half. I hate using milk in my coffee. I make good coffee, not some burnt water flavored shit that comes hermetically sealed in a foil vacuum pack, and I deserve real half and half! Dangit!


BridgetJ said...

Being out of half n half is an emergency in my house. I refuse to pour regular milk or that powdered shit into a great cup of Breadfast Blend.

The picking up a habit for Lent is a great idea. Hmmmm....so many choices...

Jo said...

Oh my hell this had me seriously laughing hard! I've often thought Lent sucks and have to laugh at my jack-catholic husband whenever he mentions it.

I gave up Lent for Lent... well at birth since I'm not Catholic. And what is with non-Catholics observing Lent?

I gave up my adrenal glands, my thyroid, a neck full of cancer, and longevity of life so I'm not giving up a single damn thing for Lent! ;) Love reading your blog.

Almost Lazarus said...

I'm a recovering Catholic, forced to participate from birth until age 18. The thing is, you can't quit being Catholic.