Thursday, January 11, 2007

word to whomever

Oh the things you can learn when you not only have a word of the day show up in Bloglines but you are also willing to do a little searching in the interest of the blog! This did indeed start out with a word of the day which I happen to get from

Today's word is speculum. Of course we all know it as that thing that looks like pure hell to those of us that haven't had one inserted, and to those others, we'll call them women. But there are other kinds of speculums, the fear of which we can all feel even if we never really feel the real specimen. Speculums are generally understood to be used to open up the gals to give the doctor a peek into the undercarriage, but they also come in rectal varieties, an orifice we all share. And what about the eyes, because they aren't getting out so easy.

But why restrict the speculum to such unpleasantness? Can there be other kinds of speculums that aren't so . . .so . . .ohmygodareyouserious?

Here's a pretty speculum, the legousia speculum. Isn't it pretty?

Would you like another? Did you know that the bright spot on a duck's wing is also called a speculum? Now what's prettier than a duck? Well, shit, honestly, that's an easy question, but a duck is prettier than a medical orifice-opener not matter how you look at it, unless you like medical devices.

Okay, we'll end with the mushroom. Yes, the following is an entoloma speculum. Mushrooms can be pretty even if we shouldn't eat them. There's a special something behind any mushrooms, but I'm not going into that. Okay, I imagine fairy families living inside of or underneath whenever it's been a little moist out and the crazy mushrooms start showing up.

And look, I give you all this without an actual picture of any of the uncomfortable kind. You really should thank me for this. Seriously!

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